And The Thanksgiving Championship Title goes to…

Congratulations go out to my auntie and uncle:

They won Thanksgiving this year!

18 people, 2 turkeys (one of them jerked and oh em gee, it was off-the-charts delicious), and enough dishes only a teaspoon-sized serving of each could be accommodated on the plate.
A lesser table couldn’t have withstood such bounty. So laden with food was the table that, for its part, it was undoubtedly thankful that Thanksgiving happens but once a year.

And for my part, I hammed it up for the guests and relatives, fulfilling my role as the mid-20's unmoored artiste.
With aplomb, I may add (none too humbly).