Exhibit 4: Wherein the Universe Ultimately Seizes my Attention with Great Vigor

My friend Steph, in reference to the stories from my Korean Saga, once wrote to me that there are always hard times in the mix with such adventure, but the memories I have will color the entire retirement home I get to when I'm 95 yeas old (she's one of my favorite people ever). Something tells me the same could be said of my current adventures, despite the conspicuous absence of exotic local.

Exhibit 4 is my star witness. It’s the “aha!” moment that interconnects a series of previously unrelated and seemingly meaningless things. It’s watching the tension disappear from Kevin Spacey’s crippled hand in The Usual Suspects. Exhibit 4 is beautiful.

***

The poignancy of this latest round is amplified by some treacherous not-paying-attention-to-my-intuition-(and-after-all-that’s-happened-!!) on my part. The full details are unnecessary; it involved a place I found early last week. I wanted so much for it to work that I completely tuned out the signs that were busily kicking me in the shins, their vain attempt to snare my attention. In the end, it worked out for the best (naturally), but at the time it didn’t feel that way. I’d love to say that I’ve gained all this valuable insight about listening to my intuition and learned my lesson, but I’m not foolish enough to think it will stick. The backslide will happen again, and again… it’s just the way of things.

So, without further ado, I give to you Exhibit 4:

Beth is a friend from York. She and her brother Dan grew up here. In fact, the first time I came to Ottawa was with Beth. Actually, come to think of it, the second time was for her wedding… Anyway, Beth and Dan have family in Moncton. They came to visit their relatives last December and we party-ed it up on New Year’s (I have pictures; we looked sharp). Other than a brief introduction at the wedding and hearing lots about him the whole time I’ve known Beth, this was the first time I had met Dan. And, just like his sis, he’s a great person and I liked him immediately.

When I saw Beth in the spring and asked what Dan was up to, word had it he was moving to Vancouver in the fall. And when coming to Ottawa presented itself and I was talking to Beth about the city and places to stay, she said it was too bad her mom was selling the house (she moved in with her new husband) because there had always been plenty of room. Oh well!

Jump ahead to a week and a half ago:
Biking to class Tuesday morning, I pass someone I think I recognize. I’d been taking the same route around the same time for over a week by this point and assumed it was just another regular. Then, it hit me: he looked like Dan. But it couldn’t be. Because he was in Vancouver. And even if he wasn’t, what are the chances that he would be biking to Nepean? And that we would pass each other? And that I would recognize him? While he was wearing a bike helmet?!

So, I kind-of, sort-of didn’t think it was actually Dan, but took it as a sign to send Beth an e-mail asking if he was in the city. And she told me he was! And that he’s living in the house on McLeod with three other roommates. And that he’s not really accessible by e-mail, but I should give him a call.

And I do. And we play phone tag for a while. And then it occurs to me that maybe, just maybe, he’ll know of someone looking for a roommate. So I leave him a phone message to that effect. And a few days later, after an ongoing fruitless and disheartening search for a place, I get a message: Dan’s household has a spare room that just opened up. And it turns out that it was him I passed that morning.

Dan’s response:
“Talk about serendipity.”

And I tell him that I do.

***

I meet up with Dan. And we have tea and talk for hours and decide that I would be a good fit for the household. And here I am. And it’s perfect! I now have a room in a real home that is close to everything, four cool roommates (including Dan, hitherto known as Brother Dan), and Phoebe, one of the smartest dogs I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

The End.

But not really.

With all this talk of coincidence, serendipity, and signs from the universe, you may be starting to wonder if I’ve been spending a little too much time with people who eat only raw food or something like that.

Here’s how I see it:
I know that I am in the exact right place for this moment in my life. There are no doubts in my mind. I imagine this doesn’t happen all that often in the course of a lifetime.

Yet, despite this insight, it’s hard when it means leaving the people you love. I miss my family, my friends, my home. When I’m in the right mindset, I remind myself how fortunate I am to have so much love in my life.
But then there are times when I have this pervasive feeling of rawness, like chaffed skin, when all I really want is a hug and my lack of physical proximity to the ones I love resonates throughout my body in the form of a dull ache.
And that sucks.

So when things are less than ideal – the “perfect” place falls through, my turning in class seems beyond hope, there is no one to go out with because I just don’t know enough people yet – and it would be so easy to throw in the towel, hop on a plane, and be at my parents’ place in time for dinner, these synchronous moments crop up, each one seeming to whisper, “Keep going, your on the right track.”
And that’s why I’ve been waxing on about them. I have to remind myself that they did, in fact, happen. And that I am in exactly the right place.

I miss you.

All of you.